Sunday, May 20, 2007

Decisions Made.

I have made a really tough decision today. Tougher still because although I am moving towards a new start and being in a place where I feel I can move on, I am also leaving behind a piece of me.

I am returning to South Africa. Hopefully in June.

I am fully aware of the impact this decision will have on the lives of those who I leave behind, and the cats. This wasn't something that was easy to decide. It has just been another painful barb in the chain that has begun the year.

On the other hand, I am also relieved and looking forward to being reunited with family and friends.

It's a strange mix of joy and pain that this has brought. I know I have made the decision from the centre of my life, so I know it's the right thing to do.

And regardless of what you may think, Kate, I still love you.


  1. I just love the way that people who have such strong things to say feel the need to hide behind "anonymous". Sheesh.

    June? As in next month, June? That means no margaritas or walks along the "Viking Way". Nuts. However, it might be just the thing you need - back amongst family and old friends, familiar places, and closer to the memories of your father.

    It's sad that you'll be seperated from your babies (including the hamster...everyone always forgets the hamster!) but at least they'll have Kate and can stay together. Once you get settled again in SA, I hope that you'll continue to write (including blogging). And who knows? Not only have I never been to the UK, I've also never been to Africa... ;-) Keep us updated on the move if you can.

    And I have no doubts you still love Kate. Love doesn't stop just because two people aren't physically together anymore. It's hard to turn off your heart.

  2. Had my account let me sign last night I would've said the same thing. And just for information purposes - The cats won't be together and they most certainly won't be with me cuz at the end of June the 6 of us are homeless. Way to go Tanya. Like I said already - BULLSHIT.

  3. seems to me that six weeks is more than enough time to find a new place to stay - even enough time to find a spot that's cat-friendly?

  4. With all due respect, I'm not sure I understand the resentment your decision has caused. Surely Kate and the two anonymous commenters are not expecting you to stay here, in a country that holds nothing for you, just for the sake of... what? Convenience of housing? It seems rather unfair to guilt you like this.

    Kerry is right: there is plenty of time to find another place. Though I do feel bad for the cats (and the hamster). Any chance you can bring them with you to SA?

  5. OOoh! I have an idea for the kitties! Methinks Red and *Asterisk's housemate, the infamous CAT, could use a playmate or two. Perhaps if we try really hard, we can convince them to take one or five ;-)

    And Red's right, it is unfair for someone to try to make you feel guilty. As I recall (although I could be wrong), it wasn't really your decision to break up in the first place was it? However, I should probably keep my rather large nose out of the situation lest I say something I might later regret...

    Happy thoughts headed your way.

  6. I don't know either of you, so my comment is unbiased. Maybe not correct, but certainly unbiased. Kate - get over yourself. Tanya is no longer with you and has no obligation to keep you housed. You're an adult, find a new place to live. And if you want to keep the cats, find a place that allows pets. Don't give Tanya a guilt trip, it's not fair and it's not nice. Tanya - enough with the whole Buddha thing. Do what you know in your heart is right. You don't have to justify your moves or feel responsible to others. Move on from the painful year that has been to the wonderful year that still can be. All that said, ladies, no hesitating, no complaining and no half measures. And in the words of Richard (Greg Kinnear) in Little Miss Sunshine, "Refuse to Lose!".

  7. I find it amusing that people that don't know anything about the situation feel they can make a judgement about Tanya and I. The fact is that what you guys read on here is only 1 side of the story which contains the bare bones of what is actually happening and the reasons why. There are 2 people that know the full story 100% and that would be me and Tanya. So until you're blessed with all the facts maybe your judgements and critisms are a little out of line and unjustified? Tanya chooses to tell the whole world what she thinks they need to know on here, which is ok, but the danger with that is, as we've seen, one of us is made out to be the bad guy. The truth is that there is no bad guy in this story - all we have are 2 people that have shared a very good 4 years of their life together who are now finding it hard to move on. I make no apologies for the way I've acted because as Tanya says, I am hurting too and that is as much my right as it is hers. Tanya, don't ever stop with what you believe in - keep your buddha close to your heart and find strength from it cuz that is what makes you the beautiful person that you are xxx