RANDOM BLOGGERY

Happy Monday! A new week begins and I thought it may cheer most of us up if I posted a picture of pussy on my blog. The cat in question is Madame Tinkie. Mischa, Lucifer and Little Miss Tinkles over here are nice and snug indoors while Noodle roams the neighbourhood. Right now, it's pelting down with rain and the weather is being typically English.

I have stolen this off Sibri's Buddhist blog. It's Daisaku Ikeda's guidance for today and I thought I should share:

"We need to cultivate a state of life where we can thoroughly enjoy ourselves at all times. We should have such joy that even at the time of death we can declare with a happy smile: "That was wonderful! Where shall I go next?" This is the state of mind of a person with strong faith. Such individuals will be reborn without delay and in a form and in a place exactly according with their desires. Faith enables us to attain the kind of generous and all-embracing state of mind where we can enjoy everything in our lives."

Nice, huh?

When I went through a serious depressive episode about two years ago, that kind of thing seemed impossible to me. How could I be happy with my life? How can I enjoy my life? My life was miserable!

Thankfully, with the right kind of help and support I can read that and nod my head sagely and say, "Yeah. I can dig that."

Geneen Roth in her book "When You Eat At The Refrigerator, Pull Up a Chair" warns of what she calls "Fat and Ugly Attacks" that make you feel really rubbish. She also advises that when you feel really rubbish - fat and ugly and whatever else - try to look at a rose. Or imagine one. The rose doesn't think you're fat/ugly/rubbish/whatnot. In fact, no one is telling the rose that it's ugly. It just is. Perfect. Beautiful. Lovely. So are we. All.

I reckon that's what my weight problem is about. It's nothing to do with how large I am. I was a size 12 and I still felt fat. It's not about weight. It's about not loving and respecting myself JUST AS I AM. I don't need false boobs or a tiny waist or a huge pay packet to feel good about who I am. I just need to feel good about who I am and all the rest will fall in place. (Buddhists, in other words, I need to honour my Buddhahood.)

This weekend that's precisely what has become apparent to me. That there is nothing that I need to change about my appearance. I am lovely.

So why bother, then, with losing weight?

Simple: I have developed a massive amount of respect for this body. Respecting my body means providing it with the nourishment that will enable it to perform to optimum ability. A diet of crisps, soda and chocolates will not achieve this. I am not depriving myself or going on a crash diet. I am celebrating and honouring what is the most unexpectedly beautiful gifts ever handed to me by the universe: this body.