Showing posts with label bullshit. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bullshit. Show all posts

Tuesday, December 02, 2008

Why I Have Left the SGI
(and started my own religion)

The SGI (Soka Gakkai International) is the lay organization for the Buddhism of Nichiren Daishonen. I started practicing this Buddhism in 2004 and received my Gohonzon (a holy scroll that represents your life) in 2005.

Initially, I believed I had found where I belonged, but gradually, and especially since coming to SA and joining SGI SA, I realised that the organisation ain't really that organised. I began to grow very disillusioned with the organization altogether, and several events culminated and allowed me to make the decision to break ties completely.

I am not faulting the practice of Buddhism – Nichiren Daishonen’s or anyone else’s. It’s not the practice of Buddhism I have left behind: it’s the SGI.

In points, and no particular order, here are my reasons:

For a practice that is supposed to be about tolerance, I have seen a great deal of judgement delivered. One of the Buddhists in SGI-SA is also a Sangoma (witch doctor). He was brave enough to get up and tell everyone how chanting had enhanced his work as a Sangoma. Later, two leaders of the SGI were whispering about how taken aback they were about this guy being so open. According to them, he should not have even mentioned it. I was asked to write an article about this guy for the fledgling Buddhist magazine and was instructed by one of the same leaders, quite strictly, not to mention the “Sangoma thing”. This same person, when I mentioned I was a healer, asked if I had permission (!!!!) from the SGI to do that, as she knew about a woman in the UK who worked with crystals who had to get permission from SGI-UK to do so. Hmm. The organization likes to talk about “absolute freedom”, but clearly it doesn’t live it. I see auras, communicate with the dead, channel paintings and do Reiki healing. I could see myself heading the same way as the Buddhist-Sangoma.

I am openly gay and while I didn’t encounter any homophobia with the UK groups, I have in South Africa. I was waiting in line for a cup of tea at the end of a meeting, chatting to one of the ladies behind me. She was bemoaning the fact that she just couldn’t find the right man. I joked that perhaps she should be looking for the right woman. We both cracked up and laughed about this. The man in front of us, also a leader in the SGI, turned around and with venom spat out: “You people with your agendas. You come in and take our women from us. What’s the matter with you? Why can’t you just leave our women alone? Why do you always have to push your agenda in everyone’s faces?” He looked so angry, I was certain he would have hit me, if he had the chance. His tirade went on, saying pretty much the same thing in several different ways. Not cool. Another member in Singapore has told me that because she was gay, she was being ostracized by her family – all of whom are practicing Nichiren Buddhists with the SGI.

The SGI discourages investigation into other schools of Buddhism. Nichiren Buddhism is promoted as the ONLY path. So is Christianity.I like to think for myself and explore. If people are telling me not to look into other schools of Buddhism, I want to know why, and telling me that “those schools are wrong” isn’t a good enough reason. The SGI also discourages silent meditation. Again, the ONLY path is to chant. Stuff that – I have gained a lot of insight from silent meditation as well as chanting.

The SGI is infatuated with its lay leader, Daisaku Ikeda. Maybe I just didn’t get the lesson of mentor/disciple, but from working with Demartini’s Quantum Collapse Process, I know that I am no greater or lesser than another person. Yes, he has written great works and is a great leader, however, I am not going to view him as some kind of Buddhist Jesus. Nichiren’s Buddhism tells us we are ALL Buddhas. We all have Buddhahood. Then this man is no more enlightened than anyone else – we are both Buddhas.

Talking about everyone being Buddhas… We are told we are all Buddhas, but when we begin to think for ourselves and move away from the SGI, investigate other faiths and practices or meditate silently, you are labeled arrogant and ignorant.

I engaged in SGI activities. When my schedule no longer permitted me to be as involved, I was given a series of phone calls and emails, bordering on guilt trips in order to get me to come back. The organization didn’t like NO as an answer. Even after leaving, I have been pursued with a cult-like enthusiasm to return.

Finally, I don’t need to have permission to do what I do, nor is it necessary to apologise for who I am. No one has the right to tell me how my spiritual life should be structured or what I must believe.

So I have started my own religion. I call it Hectic Eclectic and I embrace all things and nothing. In fact, I do a lot of embracing. I’ve named myself the Huru Guru and I am basking in my own glory.

I am much happier calling my own shots.

Monday, March 19, 2007

Adventures in Religion

An interesting discussion is happening over on A Blog About Nowt. *(asterisk) encourages the question whether religion is worth it, or if it is simply a large boogeyman used to excuse and justify human rights abuse.

As an ex-Catholic I have witnessed how religion is used to control and manipulate people. It's the easiest way to do it en masse. And if you are able to make people feel really bad about themselves just so that you can use it against them and get them to do what you want them to, then that is pure evil. Many religions claim to promote love and tolerance, yet many of the adherents do not live this way at all. In fact, wars are waged in the name of religion.

What organised religion does is not that much different from an abusive partner:

1. Self esteem is broken down and dependency on the abuser is enforced
2. The victim is isolated from other people and told that certain individuals are bad influences or wrong for them
3. A set of rules needs to be followed. If they are not, consequences are dire
4. Complete unquestioning devotion is the only behaviour tolerated. Anything else will result in dire consequences
5. Any behaviour that deviates from the rules and views of the abuser will not be tolerated and will result in severe punishment

Does that mean that all religion needs to be outlawed? No. I believe our freedom to choose to practice whatever Faith we want is a fundamental human right. Enforcing that faith on someone else, however, amounts to abuse.

I practice Nichiren Buddhism. Yes, I see it as a religion. Yes, I devote myself to chanting twice a day and living my practice as best I can. It is a Faith based on respect, tolerance and compassion. Is it the only Faith that works? Do I need to enforce it on anyone else? No. I have no right to do that. For me, freedom is something that is very important. What I do not respect is people blowing themselves up or waging war or committing violent and depraved acts in the name of religion. Because I don't like hypocrites.

What are your thoughts?

Thursday, March 15, 2007

My Spider Senses Be Tingling, (and a few other things...)

I took an instant dislike to the Cowboy who came to assess our heating situation. My spider senses definitely were activated. He spent 5 minutes with me, tapped on our oil tank and came inside with me and took a cursory look at our boiler. All the while, he mentioned (and I counted it) that I would have to pay his call out fee for this no more than ten minute visit 7 times. He then proceeded to try to engage me in conversation about South Africa. I was not interested in paying for the privelege of his lacklustre conversation and told him I had to head off to work. The Cowboy's call out fees, it transpires, is £60. His fees for the next visit would be £60 call out plus £60 to do the work. Can anyone out there say RIP OFF? I knew you could. So my boss recommended a nice little old man who did a good job for him last year. And the old man lives in my village. His charge? £30 for the work and if it takes him longer than an hour, then, "I am sorry, dear, but I would have to charge a little extra." Cowboy or Old Boy? As if I have to decide. The Old Boy is coming on Tuesday morning. I am looking forward to telling the Cowboy that I think he's a rip off. And that's bullshit.

Now Here's An Idea...

Remember how we all got up nice and early in October to take sunrise photos for when the clocks went back? How about we all take a sunset picture on Sunday 25 March for the clocks going forward? To round the whole winter thing off? No? Well, I plan to do that because it makes sense to my strange little brain. All those wanting to join me, leave a comment so I know who to watch out for on the 25th. Even if you guys in SA don't do the clock thing, why not join in and put a sunset pic up on the 25th anyway to mark the passage of the seasons? Let me know if you're in!

I Teach.

Feels like I have bitten off more than I can comfortably chew, but not so much that I can't just chomp down for a few bites and be ok. My students are really pushing for an advanced course. So. I have to force myself out of my comfort zone and make this happen. Abracadabra. I. Am. Scared. Shitless. This is what I really want to do, and I am so excited, so why the hell am I so afraid? Ah yes. The fucking Devil King of the 6th Heaven trying to sell me his bullshit. Right. I have to work quickly on this and develop my proposal and send it off and if nothing happens, source a venue and decide on a reasonable fee. I have to fight back these negative self doubting feelings. And there's a little voice going, "You're just a big fat fake" that needs to be silenced. So the goal is to have something in place by 30 March. If not, then at least a lead onto something. I would probably insist on taking a 2 week break before starting in on the course stuff again. I should have something up and running by mid April.

I Write

Did I mention that the local magazine has accepted my idea of the article? Well, they want photos as well and I would need to get all of this organised before and on their desks by Mid April as well. There are a couple of short stories I am sending out as well and this year, I am going to be brave and enter a couple of competitions. Go me! I have also, as some may already know, started writing my novel. Hoorah! Take that Devil bloody King of the 6th Heaven.

Thursday, March 01, 2007

A More Detailed Update on Recent Events in the Life of Tanya

General Health
Been to the doctor this morning. My shoulder, apparently, is not what is causing me the excrutiating agony that I have been living with. The doctor seems to think that the problem stems from my neck and has ordered a course of physio and an x-ray, just to check that no vertebrae are squishing things and that things are generally in order. I get zapped by radiation tomorrow morning. Which is very quick for the NHS, really. She thinks I may have a trapped nerve or something. As long as they can fix it with a minimal amount of drugs, I am fine with it. Having said that, though, I did ask her for a refill of the mega-supa-dupa painkilling medicine she prescribed for me in October.

I avoid allopathic medicine as much as possible, preferring herbal remedies and alternative treatments. Sometimes, when I need it, it's nice to know that I can take the magic bullet, even though I know it's just treating a symptom and not the cause. I can't afford to see my Medicine Man, nor can I afford the treatments such as shiatsu or acupuncture, which I feel would be the most helpful for this. So I am at the mercy of the NHS and I am grateful for their physio and chemicals.

Creative Writing Workshop
I am having so much fun teaching people! I love seeing people grasping the ideas, seeing the light go on in their eyes as they start to make sense of it all. Most of all, I love that they feel inspired to be more creative. The more I do this, the more I feel I was born to do this. That this is my perfect job. The job that isn't WORK. The job that I would happily do for free because I love it that much. Can I really make a living doing nothing but teaching creative writing? Really? How?

Last night, none of the men in the class showed up and it was just the ladies. Completely different vibe. I noticed that the women seemed a lot freer and expressive without the men around. Interesting.

Driving home, I had several ideas pop into my head. One day workshops. Weekend workshops. Retreats. And the ideas began to scare me because the more I thought about them, the BIGGER they got. And the self doubt crept in. And you know what I decided? I decided that the self doubt can be consigned to the category of bullshit. And we all know how I feel about bullshit. So.

Here are all these ideas. And I have no qualifications other than my experience and my instincts. Sounds like a recipe for adventure!

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Once Upon A Time...

...there was a girl named Tanya who was reasonably laid back. It was a glorious time. Then an evil witch put a spell on all the HSBC banks in the land causing their branch numbers to vanish from phone books and the internet, replacing them with one single number, which rang through to the Call Centre of Hell. Tanya begged the demonic call centre woman to tell her the phone number of her local branch, but the demon refused, replying instead with, "We don't have the branch numbers in our office."

"Please," said Tanya, "I must speak with a Financial Advisor. Only she will know how to help me slay my Debt Dragon!"

"Very well, " said the demon, "I will put a call through to the Oakham branch and have them contact you."

HUH? They don't have the fucking number, yet they are phoning the branch on my behalf? What about my autonomy? I can't talk to my bank without 'mommy' telling me it's ok? Fuck this.

Bullshit.

And as long as we're on the subject of Bullshit...

I recently spoke to a woman who was slagging off people from a different race group to hers, calling them derogatory names and when I challenged her on her racism, she insisted she wasn't racist at all. BULLSHIT!

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

A Little Clarification, but First...

In a recent entry, I wrote of my lustful dream of the lovely, though weird, Dita von Teese. Kate, the cheeky (von) Minx, has decided to exact her revenge. She has posted a picture of her gothic dream girl. What's a girl to do? Please swing around Kate's blog and check it out.

What's the Story with the Bullshit?

I've had several emails from friends who are concerned for my mental welfare. I assure you I am not insane (well, not any more insane than I already am) and that all is well. Life is too short for Bullshit happens to be my motto. And I have developed a rather lowered tolerance for bullshit in recent weeks.

Several things that have occurred since my return from SA have only served to fuel my feelings about this and have lowered my already miniscule tolerance even further.

Pray tell: What is this Bullshit of which you speak?

You really want to know? Ha! I am really disappointed in some people I thought I could trust.

The current atmosphere at work is funereal. Indeed. It's like someone died. (Someone has, but you know what I mean) In fact, you'd have more fun at an actual funeral. I've been to one recently and I DID have more fun.

What Else Constitutes Bullshit?

A few examples, but by no means a complete list:

* Fake friends
* Telemarketers
* Sour faced, middle aged women who grimace at your attempts to make them smile
* Job hanging in the balance
* People who aren't direct and beat around the bush
* Junk mail
* Advertising
* Catholic adoption agencies willing to cut off their noses to spite their face
* Ignorant twats